Crossing arrows
by Lennelle
Summary: Due to Kili's reckless nature, Bilbo's plan to escape the Elvenkings halls doesn't go exactly as was hoped but how will the Company cope with the consequences?
1. First Impressions

**I took a break from the depressingness of my other hobbit fic to write something a bit more light hearted. This just popped into my head because we don't hear much about the dwarves experience in the Mirkwood cells. Anyway, enjoy :)**

Kili had been sitting on the same floor of the same corner of the same cell for hours. He had managed to entertain himself by counting every brick in the confined area. Things were surprisingly dull when Fili wasn't around. Kili had thought the rest of the company would be in nearby cells but when he had called out there was no answer. He finally discovered he was all alone and even worse that he felt lonely. The elf guards didn't help much either, although, he had always known that their kind weren't really the most fun beings in middle earth.

He noticed a small rock settled on the dusty floor and leaned forward, grasping it in his hand. He shifted his weight back into position and looked thoughtfully at the rock as he rubbed it between his fingers. They had taken his bow and arrows before they had even arrived in the elf kingdom and Kili's fingers yearned to pull back a bowstring.

Kili hurled the rock at the wall opposite him. This was probably the closest thing to target practise he would get. The pebble bounced clumsily before landing by his foot and Kili proceeded to throw the rock before picking it up and beginning again. This went on for a few minutes; throw, crack, bounce, pick up, before a fair voice rang out from behind the bars.

"Would you stop that?" the red haired elf woman stood outside the cell, her face was stern. Kili snorted at her; elves were too serious.

"No," he replied simply before he continued to throw the rock, not moving his gaze from the elf.

"I wasn't asking," she said warningly.

"Yes you did, you asked me a question and I replied," Kili reminded her. She gave Kili a glare which could have frozen even Thorin in his tracks but Kili only found it enticing. He dropped the stone on the ground and leaned back, staring straight ahead but the red head glowed in the corner of his eye and he turned to find her still looking at him.

"See something you like?" he asked, a grin creeping onto his face.

"Watch yourself dwarf!" she snapped.

"Isn't that what you're doing?" he retorted. She rolled her eyes, turned to the side and began to sharpen her knife. Kili looked at her, she is attractive, he thought, in a hairless, elfish kind of way. Her eyes found him as she sheathed her blades. She turned on him and knitted her brows together.

"You have good aim," she said, gesturing to the stone, "for a dwarf."

"You're not bad looking," Kili replied, "for an elf."

She scowled at this, "You have something elf-like about your face," she mocked, "maybe it's the lack of beard and the shortness of your nose."

Kili rubbed the scruff which grew shortly around his neck and jaw. "I do have a beard," he insisted, "It's just not fully grown yet."

She laughed at this. Kili was taken aback; he didn't think that elves ever laughed or had a sense or humour for that matter.

"Do you have a name, dwarf?" she asked.

"Yes, doesn't everyone?" Kili smirked. She raised an eyebrow at this.

"You have a sharp tongue…" she looked to him to fill the silence which hung in the air.

"Kili," he finished.

"Kili," she repeated, "I am Tauriel, captain of the elf guard."

"Captain," Kili saluted to her, "Can I ask what a captain is doing? Flirting with the prisoner?"

"Don't flatter yourself, Kili, I am most certainly not flirting with you."

"So why are you talking to me?"

"Curiosity," Tauriel answered simply.

"Curiosity is one of my middle names; along with danger and handsome," said Kili.

Tauriel ignored this and lowered herself so that her head was at Kili's level, "Is that why you have come here?" she asked casually.

Kili laughed sharply, "Do you think I'm that idiotic? Even a face like yours can't make me betray my uncle," he stood up and moved closer to the bars so their faces were inches apart.

"Curiosity," he continued, "I wouldn't think elves would be so interested in dwarfs."

"More interested in what they're doing in our realm," she assured. There was a long pause between them as they searched each other's faces. Finally, Tauriel sighed and stood up straight. Kili pressed himself against the bars as she walked away.

"Wait!" he called, "Where are you going?"

She looked over her shoulder and sneered, "My duties are finished here," she continued walking away until all Kili was left with were the echoes of her foot steps.

He leaned against the wall and felt the heat in his face when he was brought to his senses by a voice from the corridor.

"Kili?"

"Bilbo?" Kili replied, "Bilbo!"

"Yes, it's me," he replied hurriedly, "and before you ask; yes I am invisible and no; there isn't time to explain. Here is a message from Thorin."

Bilbo proceeded to tell Kili the plan; he was the last one he had told and the rest of the company were ready to act. When Kili had been told and fully understood the plan Bilbo finally asked.

"Did you like her?"

Kili felt his cheeks flush and his eyes widened, "Wh-what? No!" he stuttered before he finally found his words, "She's an elf! I mean, she's pretty and_"

He halted himself as he realised what he was saying, "Not enough beard for me," he concluded.

"Alright then," Bilbo didn't sound convinced.

"Bilbo, you tell anyone, and I mean anyone, I will make Smaug look like a kitten."

Bilbo chuckled, "I will take this to my grave."

**Hope you enjoyed! And please review, I would really appreciate it! And I will be continuing with my other chapter fic "roads go ever ever on" and I would also love to hear which characters you would like to read about so feel free to PM me :)**


	2. Barrels Abound

**A couple of you requested that I make this a multi-chapter story and I thought, why not? I was surprised by the feedback and would like to say thank you for the lovely reviews and just for you guys I'm going to be continuing this until the end and I would love it if you would join me :) here we go…**

There were no elves outside Kili's cell. He hadn't seen Tauriel since the day before and the boredom had spiralled out of control. All Kili could do was wait for the rest of the Company and continue to hurl rocks against the wall. The silence which had lingered in the hallway was fading against the growing thuds of heavy feet. Kili pricked up his ears and raised an eyebrow. This is too loud to be elves, he thought and suddenly his face lit up with realisation. He clambered to his feet as he moved for the bars, dropping the rock carelessly behind him. The rest of the Company halted before his cell door and some, mostly Bombur, were heaving breaths as they rested on their knees. Kili gripped the bars and leaned forward casually.

"You took your time," Kili laughed, "You have no idea how bored I've been."

Kili shot Bilbo a warning look as the hobbit snorted. No one else seemed to take notice but carried on panting.

"These halls are endless," Ori wheezed.

"And we were considering whether or not to come and get you," a familiar voice came from the small crowd. Fili stepped out and gave his brother a smile of relief, "But we couldn't find anyone else who would be able to shoot arrows and look great while doing so."

Kili laughed and tried to clasp his brother's shoulder through the bars.

"Erm, would you mind?" He gestured to the lock.

"Bilbo," Thorin called. The hobbit was hit with surprise and began to fiddle clumsily through the tangle of keys. Kili hadn't noticed his uncle until now and stood back as the burglar twisted the key in the lock. It clicked open and Kili was met with his brother's embrace. Thorin clapped Kili's shoulder.

"You two have the keenest eyes," he told his sister-sons, "I want one of you at the front and one of you at the back."

Kili sighed and retreated the rear of the Company's formation. They hurried in single-file down winding corridors with Bilbo and Thorin at the front. Bombur was lagging behind as his weary legs slowed down and Kili found himself pushing his companion on. Kili felt the air knocked out of his lungs as he slammed into Bombur's back. He straightened himself up and realised that the rest of the group were slipping through a large arched doorway and he followed after them.

His nose was filled with the scent of fruits. Bottles filled with red and purple liquids lined the walls from floor to ceiling and huge barrels, probably big enough to squeeze Bombur, stood in clusters all over the room. Kili could see awe mirrored in the Company's eyes as he realised that they were in a wine cellar. His fingers found the smooth glass of a wine bottle and he lifted it into both hands as he fumbled at the cork.

"Don't you dare!" Thorin hissed. His uncle glared at him until the bottle was safely returned to the shelf and turned back to their Burglar. Kili sighed at the sight of untouched wine as his tongue itched for a drop of liquid. He was distracted as Bofur passed him and he turned to Nori, whose hair had untangled into a wild mess.

"How come he still has his hat?" he asked. Nori answered with a "shhh!" and pointed to the corner where a couple of elves sat with their heads on the table; fast asleep.

Kili hushed his tone and continued, "They took all of our things."

Nori smiled, "Don't underestimate his love for that hat," he whispered and he moved on to the where the rest of the Company stood. Kili followed and stood by his brother. His heart dropped as he realised that there was no way out. All the light in the room had poured from flickering candles not windows or doors.

"What do we do now?" Bofur's voice strained to whisper.

"Get in the barrels," Bilbo answered.

Whispers erupted amongst the Company and Kili peered past his brother to find thirteen barrels piled awkwardly in the centre of the room.

"Trust me," Bilbo pressed. The Company looked to Thorin who hesitated before nodding. The Company sighed and proceeded to climb into the barrels. Kili slipped himself into the first barrel right next to Fili. It was more spacious than he would have thought but the smell of apples was overpowering and Kili wrinkled his nose. Kili surfaced again and breathed in the duller air but he was surprised to find Bilbo tugging at a leaver with no success. He looked down and saw the deep grooves which ran all around the barrels, the sound of gushing water underneath filled his ears and he realised what Bilbo was trying to do. But there weren't enough barrels for everyone and he had never heard of a swimming hobbit. He pushed himself out and made for the leaver.

Bilbo's eyes shot up "Get back in! Quickly!" he urged.

Kili rolled his eyes, "I think I might be the better swimmer."

The moans of the Company echoed from inside the barrels.

"What's going on?" he heard Fili say. His brother's golden head poked out from his barrel and he gave his younger brother a quizzical look.

Kili sighed and grabbed the hobbit by the shoulders, steering him towards the empty barrel. Bilbo stuttered in protest as he was shoved in head first.

"Don't worry," Kili assured, "I'll be right behind you!"

Fili's eyes widened, "Kili, don't!" he hissed and attempted to grab at his brother's leg but could only rip a buckle from his boot.

Kili ignored his older brother and yanked the leaver back with ease; the ground beneath his feet shook as the trapdoor gave way. Fili called out and the rest of the dwarves yelped as the barrels fell through and great splashes echoed in Kili's ears. The elves stirred in the corner of his eye as the door creaked and groaned back into place. Kili ducked hurriedly behind a barrel as the elves rushed to where the rest of the dwarves had been.

"Where are the barrels?" One of them gasped.

"The prisoners!" the other exclaimed. The elves rushed from the room and Kili dashed back to the leaver and on pulled it. The doors opened again and he peered down to the gushing river below. He swallowed hard at the looming distance between himself and the water. He shut his eyes briefly as he stepped back. His feet were frozen momentarily and Kili calmed himself as he breathed slowly before he readied himself to dash. He was right at the edge when he was yanked back by his collar. He choked as he slammed against the wooden floor and attempted to blink stars from his vision.

"Is idiot one of your middle names too?" the voice was like a soft melody. Kili looked up. Tauriel towered above him, her eyes blazed like the flame of her hair. Several other elves crowded around him with arrows notched in their bows; all aimed at him.

"I'm pleased that you remembered our conversation," Kili tried to mock her but all of his confidence had vanished as soon as the trapdoor finally clicked shut.

**Hope you all enjoyed and I would like to thank you for making this happen because without you I would have never done this. I will be continuing with my other fic too but I am quite busy in the real world so please be patient. Once again, thanks for inspiring me to continue this, I really enjoyed writing it :)**


	3. A severed bond

**I fixed my internet! I finally saw the desolation of Smaug at the cinema and wow! I have no words, I really loved it! Obviously my story is straying from the original so it won't be anything like the book or movie (If you have read or seen either please don't spoil for everyone else) . I want to thank everyone for following/ favouriting/ reviewing, much appreciated!**

The water was icy as it gushed into the barrel and splashed at Fili's face like tiny drops of ice. He gulped in the fresh air; the open wilderness was welcome after being locked up for days. Time had fleeted by so quickly that Fili had to halt his swirling thoughts before realising where he was and what had happened. He looked around frantically; the other barrels were bobbing along the current just ahead of him. Each tub contained a different member of the company; Bombur had been stuffed into a barrel and could barely even move his arms and the other members were looking less than pleased. Bilbo's face reflect Fili's; it was stricken with utter shock and surprise. Fili stared with disbelief at the small metal buckle which he still gripped between his fingers, he searched the barrels and even the waters around him but couldn't find his younger brother.

His heart beat faster as the river pulled him on; they were going to leave Kili behind.

"Kili!" he cried out in desperation but no voice answered him. He clawed at the lapping waves unsuccessfully as he attempted to pull the barrel back towards the Elf Kingdom.

He turned in his barrel as Nori tossed him a sharp looking stick. Fili held the wood in his hands, unable to move.

"Fight, Fili!" Nori urged him. That was when Fili noticed the orcs. Dozens of them. They swarmed, following the barrels down the river, armed with spears and arrows. One of the foul creatures lunged at Fili but he managed to swerve his tub out of the way as it plunged into the waters depths; not to resurface.

His mind went blank and he found that all he could do was swing the stick blindly as the white water sprayed against his vision; the current was picking up.

Thorin cried out from ahead and Fili looked up to see an elf make for the leaver. Dozens of elves arrived, slaughtering the orcs, their arrows flying true. Fili hurled his stick at the elf before it had a chance to close the gate and each barrel flowed down to the wider stream. Fili's hands were empty now and all he could do was duck and swerve away from the nearing orcs.

The company hurled down the river, strong currents pulled them in all directions and Fili's vision became a blur. His hands were numb and empty and wet hair clung to his face but he attempted to grab at the nearest barrel; all thoughts had gone from his mind as they hurtled down the river. He caught hold of Bilbo who latched onto Fili's sleeve; wielding his sword in his other hand. Fili gave the hobbit a relieved smile as the current began to ease. His thoughts returned to him and with them a terrible worry followed.

"Kili," he whispered aloud.

Bilbo's eyes lit with realisation as he cast a glance around; searching for the young dwarf. Fili's heart dropped as Bilbo's eyes met his. They brought pity; something Fili rejected as he released his grip on the hobbit's tub.

Bilbo stuttered as he attempted to comfort Fili, "I didn't see him come through the trap door so he must still be there... at least he is alive," however his voice indicated his lack of certainty.

Fili drifted away slightly but he didn't care; the missing presence of his little brother loomed heavily over him. He felt his eyes sting and he buried his face in his hands; hiding from any more pitiful stares.

"Fili," Thorin called out to him, his voice sounded pity too. Fili lifted his face from his hands. He would not appear so vulnerable to the rest of them. He met Thorin's eyes with his own. His uncle little concern; his face was blank and this angered Fili; his uncle should be fighting to get Kili back as much as he was. He scowled at his uncle who only lowered his gaze with a sigh and Fili welcomed the silence of talk and the pounding noise of the river's melody. It had been quiet for some time now as the company looked out for a some low land to pull on to. Fili didn't care if he felt dry land ever again, he would rather spend eternity in a damp barrel if he could see his brother again. Bilbo was floating nearer and Fili ignored the burglar's presence even when the hobbit rested his hand on the young dwarfs shoulder briefly.

"Fili," Thorin's voice echoed from the edges of Fili's mind, it came again but the increasing urgency snapped his attention back to reality.

He looked up to find horror-filled gazes aimed in Fili's direction. Puzzled, he whipped around to be greeted by a splitting crack on the side of his head. His vision smashed together as he fell forward and slipped beneath the water's surface. Cries muffled above as Fili felt himself being pulled down, he felt panic rise to his throat as he released a cry; surrendering any breath he had left. The current tugged and pulled him in all directions as his body tumbled and hurled along the current; his fingers were held in tight fists as though to protect himself against the waters force. He tried to squint his eyes open but the icy water gushed at his vision. Fili loosened his muscled; he had all but given up as his body ached. His head burned, it felt like his skull was crushing in on itself and the pain had wracked his entire body. He was about to close his eyes for the final time when strong hands grabbed at his shoulders, wrenching him from the water as he took in a heaving breath. He coughed and spluttered, choking water from his throat. A hand rubbed his back and a deep whisper soothed him.

"Breathe, Fili," Thorin ordered. He held his nephew, sharing the weight with Dwalin as they paddled to shore. Dwalin dragged him onto dry land, the rough ground scraped against his back.

"You took quite a blow to the head there, lad," Dwalin grunted, this was the most soothing tone the dwarf could offer, "An orc got you from behind but our burglar here took it down with his letter opener."

The hobbit stood timidly on the edge of the group, his face worry stricken.

"Out the way," Oin ordered as the old dwarf pushed Dwalin aside and began to fuss over Fili's head; searching with his fingers.

"Kili," Fili gasped, he brushed the healer's hand away and attempted to sit up only to find the world push him back down as his vision blurred again.

"We will get him back," Thorin assured, "But we have little time until Durin's day so he will have to wait."

Fili found some of his strength return as he heaved himself up; his cheeks burning.

"We get him back now." Fili wasn't asking but he raised his brow in question to his uncle but his head ached with the slightest movement.

"He is far away now and we have no weapons."

"He is my brother!" Fili raised his voice but tried to shake away the dizziness.

"He would not want us to risk the quest for his sake."

Fili looked at his uncle with disbelief and let out a slightly manic laugh, "Are gold and jewels truly more important to you than kin?"

"It is our homeland, my kingdom!" Thorin's voice was rising, "Your future!"

Fili opened his mouth to speak but swayed before falling to his knees. Bofur, Balin and Bilbo rushed to help him up but Fili pushed them weakly away.

"You're alright, laddie," Balin soothed but Fili ignored the old dwarf.

"I am going back for my brother," He spoke breathlessly.

"You are not going back there in your condition," Oin protested fiercely, "I need to tend to_"

Thorin cut across the healer, "It is not long til Durin's day," he repeated,"and there are orcs on our trail; we are weaponless!"

Fili ignored his uncle and turned away, he made it a couple of feet before his eyes swam with blurred colours and light. The ground rushed beneath his feet as he crumpled to the ground. Muffled cries echoed his name and hands pulled him on to his back. Shadows crept into his vision; pushing away the faces of the company until he felt himself finally sink into the darkness.

**I really hope you enjoyed and please review! :)**


	4. Bargaining and broken hearts

**Wow! I've never had such an amazing response to a story so thanks so much for all the reviews, follows and favourites :) You guys are really inspiring me to keep writing and you don't know how much it means, anyway, on with the story!**

"Your company left you behind, dwarf," the Elf King's monotonous drawl sang out, "How you must feel; betrayed, alone, hopeless."

Thranduil paced in circles around Kili, his footsteps were silent. Kili only focused his gaze on the floor beneath his feet.

The king continued, "I had always believed your people to be a proud and loyal race; it seems I was wrong."

Kili brought his eyes to meet the icy blue stare of Thranduil, "Were you speaking to me?"

The king looked unimpressed as he lowered himself into a great throne of coiling oak branches.

Kili smirked, "Sorry I haven't been paying attention," he lowered his head to bow and added, "Your highness."

Kili felt a hand grab the scruff of his neck and force him further down, he struggled at the invisible grasp.

"You dare to speak to our King in such a way," the elf hissed.

Kili saw Thranduil give a soft wave of his delicate fingers and the grip was released. He rubbed at the back of his neck and sent a scowl at the elf; he was tall and slender with silky chestnut hair. The elf only bore his eyes back into Kili.

"Worry not, mellon," the King assured the guard, "He will not speak like that any longer if he values his life."

Thranduil unsheathed a long silver blade and admired it against the rays of sun which seeped into the King's hall. He caught Kili's glance and gave a soft smile but the ice in his eyes only sent shivers down Kili's spine.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" the King said aloud as he raised a hand to his left cheek. He strode towards Kili, "Though looks can be very deceiving."

The King held the blade before Kili's face, the metal reflected dancing light across his face. Kili reached out and gently pushed it down. The King tilted his head and curiously widened his eyes.

"Very nice," Kili commented, "But I would be careful; you could hurt someone with that thing."

Thranduil sheathed his blade, "Indeed," he agreed. He stood tall before the young dwarf and continued, "I believe you are the sister-son of Thorin, son of Thrain."

"King under the mountain," Kili interrupted through gritted teeth, "What's it to you?"

The King raised his brows, ignoring Kili's comments, "And you are on a quest to reclaim your homeland."

Kili coughed deliberately, catching many elves of guard, he looked around to find all eyes on him.

"Oh, do you mind if I ask a question?" he asked, raising a hand briefly.

"You already have," Thranduil reminded him, "But I will give you another, dwarf."

"My name is Kili," Kili warned, "And I was wondering what you want from me if you already know about our quest."

"That is not a question."

Kili sighed, "What do you want from me?"

"I will let you go," Kili's eyes lit up at this but the King gave a cruel smile, "But I want something in return."

"I don't have anything to give you," Kili stammered, eager for freedom.

"You have an entire mountain full of precious things to give."

"I have no mountain," Kili reminded him, "not yet, anyway, and _Erebor _will belong to the true King under the mountain."

"If Thorin, son of Thrain, is able to slay a dragon and reclaim the mountain then I will be happy to return you to him," Thranduil spoke clearly, "In return for white gems."

"Gems?" Kili snorted, "Is this what all of this is about?"

"The white gems of Lasgalen are something I desire very much," Thranduil continued, "You shall be free when I receive them."

"Is that it?" Kili questioned, "Me in exchange for some gems? Can I pack now?"

The silence was chilling; anyone other than elves would have laughed. But a foul screech cut through the air and everyone turned as an orc was thrust to the ground before the King's feet; its hands bound behind its back. Kili swerved out of the way only to be restrained by a guard.

The orc let out a raspy laugh as a tall elf with blond hair appeared, grabbing it from behind and put a knife to its throat.

"Silence, Filth!" The elf hissed.

Thranduil raised a hand, "Legolas," he gently warned.

Tauriel appeared by the Kings side, she glimpsed at Kili for a brief moment before speaking, "We lost the dwarves, my Lord, but orcs pursued us; killing some of our warriors." She looked at the orc with such hatred that it made Kili feel sad; she was so beautiful but so angry.

"Why have you come into my lands?" The Kings voice was as calm as before.

"You see the wood darken with sickness," It hissed in reply as it looked into Thranduil's eyes, "It won't be yours for much longer."

It let out a cackle but Tauriel silenced it by cracking the hilt of her dagger against its head. The orc hissed at her as thick black liquid trickled down its temple.

"Enough, Tauriel," The King commanded, "Take the dwarf to the cells."

The orcs eyes lit up and it turned its head to face Kili, letting out a shrieking chuckle.

"We got one of your kind," It spat, "I saw him slip under the water and he didn't come back up."

Kili's heart dropped, "You're lying," he whispered before raising his voice to a shout, "You're lying!"

The orc let out a laugh, "He had a short beard and yellow hair."

Kili dropped to his knees, "Fili," he choked.

"That's what the others cried."

Kili felt his insides burn and he let out a cry as he sprang forward; crushing the orcs throat between his fingers. He was ripped away just as quickly as he had leapt forwards. Tauriel and the other elf, Legolas, held him back but the orc only continued to let out a wheezy chuckle. Thranduil unsheathed his blade and silenced the orc with a swift whip of metal. He turned to Tauriel.

"Take him to his cell," he turned now to Kili, "My offer still stands."

Kili felt a hatred like he had never felt before, it stirred deep in his bones, and he raised his eyes to the Elf King, "Ishkhaqwi ai durugnul!"

The King ignored him and returned to his throne. Legolas gripped Kili tightly and shoved him back into the cell before disappearing. Kili felt numb but his eyes stung and his mouth trembled. He wailed as he yanked at the bars and beat against it with his feet until they were bloody. He slipped to the ground, breathless, as his body heaved silently with each tear.

"Fili was your brother," Kili recognised Tauriels voice from the other side of the bars. Kili sank further into the shadows.

"I am so sorry," she whispered, "I know what it is to lose those you love."

Kili was struck by this, his breath halted for a moment. He pulled himself into the light to find that she was gone. The emptiness crushed down on him again and he fell to the ground. The young dwarfs cries for his lost brother echoed throughout Thranduil's halls for days before they became nothing more than silent and empty sorrow.

**Poor Kili! But you'll have to see it his tears are wasted…**

**By the way the insult that Kili says to Thranduil means "I spit on your grave."**

**Thanks so much for reading and please review!**


	5. Not at home

**School is finished! Yey! That means that there will probably be a few more chapters up over the next few weeks :) Thanks to everyone who reviewed, followed and added this story to their favourites! I'm overwhelmed by the wonderful response!**

"Fili!" Thorin cried out to his nephew as the young dwarf collapsed. Fili had stumbled before keeling over, landing with a crack on his front. Thorin pushed various members of the company aside to reach his sister-son. He felt the colour drain from his face; he sweated against the cold as his heart beat against his chest for Fili was so still. He reached for Fili's shoulder to move him onto his back but his hand was smacked away.

"You'll only cause him more trouble," Oin snapped, "I need to examine his head first!"

Thorin backed away slightly as he watched the healer gently finger his way through golden hair, mumbling about the stubbornness Fili had taken from his uncle. Thorin hadn't noticed how much blood there was before; the back of Fili's head was matted with crimson and more thick liquid pulsed slowly from within the thick tats and waves.

Thorin skipped a breath when Oin spoke again, "I can try my best to stop the bleeding but he needs proper medicine," the old dwarf sighed, "He will not likely be able to survive in the wilderness."

No one spoke for their thoughts hung in the air, like a whisper on the wind; it spoke 'he will die'. Thorin would not take this; he would not lose another of his kin. If Fili were to die then Kili would never forgive him. Thorin would never forgive himself. That was if they ever got Kili back. Balin carefully placed a hand on Thorin's shoulder; something he reserved for the most desperate situations. Thorin shrugged away the comfort; he did not deserve it. He noticed that Fili's hand was curled into a fist; his knuckles white. Thorin gently parted Fili's fingers to find a small piece of metal and he examined it before his eyes. It was a buckle of shining, dark silver. Grooves flowed through with a strong and structures pattern; one which Thorin knew so well. This was Kili's buckle and Thorin felt his eyes sting, though he knew that the brother's had a strong bond, he understood now the strength they took from each other.

"He is strong," Thorin's voice broke and he was forced to compose himself as he secured the buckle in his pocket, "We will find shelter."

He found that he had no more words to speak and pushed past his companions, he breathed in the cold air as he moved towards the trees. He dropped his head as he rested against a thick trunk.

"Lake-town is two days from here," Balin's voice came from behind and Thorin turned to meet those old, kind eyes, "If we leave soon he will be fine."

"You do not know that for sure," Thorin's voice was heavy with concern, "Men do not forgive us for the day Smaug came, what if they turn us away?"

"We will find a way."

"I left Kili, Balin," Thorin's voice now wavered with guilt, his hand over his left breast pocket, "I was prepared to leave my own kin in the hands of elves."

He straightened himself; he reflected the great leader he could be with commanding eyes and a voice like thunder.

"We take Fili to Lake-town," he ordered, "I want some of the Company to return for Kili."

Although he commanded, he looked searchingly at Balin; his old confidant.

"Do not let your guilt cloud your judgement, Thorin."

Thorin looked to Balin as the old dwarf neared, clasping a firm hand on his shoulder.

"You were right; we have no weapons or supplies and the orcs pursue us. Our best chance for Fili would be to head for Lake-town and we will get Kili back if you are reasonable with the elves."

"I will be reasonable to them when that damned dragon breathes ice," Thorin spat.

Balin sighed, "Do not think of pride before your kin, and put aside your stubbornness, Thorin Oakenshield, for now you nephews need you."

Thorin hesitated before giving Balin a brief nod and he returned swiftly to the rest of the company. Fili was on his back now; his head was bandaged with a ripped, red-stained cloth though his eyes remained closed against the paleness of his face.

"He broke his hand with the fall," Oin reported, gesturing towards Fili's bandaged left hand, "I have stopped the blood flow as best as I can though I know not what damage has been done to his head; we will know for sure when he wakes."

_If he wakes_, Thorin cursed the voice which whispered in his mind; the one which yearned for the Arkenstone above all else, the one which didn't hesitate to leave Kili behind.

Oin continued, cutting across Thorin's thoughts, "I think we should be able to move him," he turned to Dwalin, gesturing for him to come closer, "Be _very _careful!"

Dwalin growled, "Nothing will so much as touch a hair on his beard!"

Dwalin bent down and carefully scooped Fili into his arms, "lead the way," he said to Thorin as he rose.

Thorin stepped forward and gently brushed his hand against Fili's cheek. He was brief and quickly averted his eyes before moving forward, signalling the company to follow.

Fili's mind swam through empty dreams. It was dark but tranquil and he felt at peace in this timeless place. Slowly, soft thuds echoed in his ears, it was almost inaudible but he knew it was there, with each thud a sharp pain pulsed in the back of his head and he wished to fall back into the peaceful and painless shadow.

_Don't worry, _a voice whispered, _I'll be right behind you!_

It sounded familiar, filled with a youthful spirit, but Fili couldn't place it. He couldn't place anything; not even the questions he needed to ask.

More voices seeped through the veil of darkness, deep and throaty voices, they grew from mumbles into clear words.

"I feel like we've been walking for days," one complained.

"Shut up, Bombur, it's only been a few hours," another replied, "You're just annoyed because you haven't eaten!"

A gruff voice came from near by, "Shut up! At least you haven't been smacked in the back of the head! We have no time to stop, for Fili's sake."

The other voices died out and it was silent again. Fili was relieved for the quiet and tried to retreat back into the dark and empty dreams but the thudding of feet and the stab of pain in his head continued. He tried to open his eyes but found that they were stiff, his head groaned at the movement.

_Don't worry, _the voice came again but Fili couldn't follow it; it came from everywhere and nowhere. He felt his will grow as he made more attempts to open his eyes. Finally, soft light seeped through, though his lids felt heavy and he groaned as his head pounded deeply.

"Oin! Thorin!" the gruff voice sounded out again but Fili silently begged it to be quiet, "I think he's waking up!"

Fili's eyes opened again, more widely this time and he was greeted by swimming vision and he squinted against the blurs and faceless figures. His sight cleared slightly as he felt himself being lowered onto a soft surface which tickled at his palms.

"Fili?" he blinked away his murky vision and saw their faces; Thick hair, large noses and worry or relief-stricken expressions.

"Fili? Can you hear me?" Fili followed the voice and found the speaker who was bent down at his side, a hand on the side of Fili's face. Fili gave a slow but painful nod in return though his confusion was apparent on his brow.

He opened his mouth to speak but his words had abandoned him, releasing a muddled groan instead. He lay there for a moment before his tongue managed to capture his speech again.

"What happened?" he mumbled.

"You've been injured; you were hit on the head."

"Where's mother?" Fili groaned.

He noticed some of the faces gasp or sigh but the one with a voice only grew paler.

"She's not here, d-don't you remember?" It stumbled on its words, "We are far from Ered Luin."

Memories flushed back into Fili's head, how could he have forgotten? Each memory encouraged the thumping in his head; a dinner party, fighting rocks, goblins, blazing trees, eagles, a huge bear and a great twisting forest like a labyrinth.

"Are we in Erebor?" he asked, lights twinkled around him, "There's so much gold, just like you told me."

Thorin sighed, "There is no gold here, Fili."

Whispers erupted amongst the company, 'what's happened to him', 'Is his mind gone'.

"This is expected with a head injury like his!" Oin grunted, "Quiet! All of you! Your noise will not do him any good."

Silence swept across the company and Fili smiled softly as his lids began to drop shut again.

"Uncle?" he muttered as the quietness of sleep beckoned to him, "What happened to the gold?"

Thorin exhaled slowly before whispering, "Don't worry, it's all here, the mountain is as glorious as you could imagine."

"Wake me for the coronation," Fili breathed.

"I will," Thorin replied quietly, "I promise."

When he looked back to his nephew he saw that he was still again save for the soft rise and fall of his chest. Dwalin returned and lifted Fili into his arms again, the young dwarfs head lolled back lightly and his arm hung limply to the side.

"It is a good sign that he woke," Oin appeared at Thorin's side, "We just need to get to Lake-town now."

Thorin nodded and signalled forward, his company followed. In the distance they could see the soft light of the moon dance across the lapping waves of the great lake and beyond that was the Lonely Mountain, its peak climbing towards the stars which glistened like gold against the darkening sky.

**Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed, more chapters up soon so stay tuned! I was thinking about drawing a new cover picture for this story, what do you think? Also, please review, I would really appreciate it! :) **


	6. Side Effects

**I made some small changes to chapters 2, 3 and 5 which will be important for the story so I recommend that you re-read :)**

"There it is," Balin exclaimed. The old dwarf halted and pointed to the distance; the company followed Balin's finger and saw Lake-town. It was a small town built from wood which rested quietly on the waves of the Long Lake. Dim lights glowed like old candles in the windows of family homes, emitting a sense of hopeless and bitter cold. However, it was one building which burned brightly amongst the flickering lights; it was large and the sounds of music and laughter echoed from it. The company felt a sigh of relief at the sight; even Dwalin could crack a smile. Thorin looked at the unconscious form of his nephew solemnly; the moonlight rested on his face and created shadows under his eyes. If Thorin could not see the light movement of his chest then he would have believed that he was dead.

"Hurry," he said flatly though Balin could see the weariness and fear in his eyes.

Upon reaching the gates of Esgaroth they were immediately confronted by two men who held spears.

"What business have you here, dwarf?" they asked Thorin.

"Please, we need medicine," The dwarf king replied. Bilbo felt something in his heart as he had never thought he would hear Thorin beg. The men looked to where Dwalin held Fili and the pity in their eyes was visible. They lowered their spears and one spoke.

"We cannot decide what is done for you," he said, "But I can take you to our Master and maybe he will show you some kindness."

"Thank you," Thorin spoke as the guard turned away and signalled for them to follow.

They arrived at the doors a great wooden building with intricate carvings. The sound of laughter and music grew as they neared and the warmth brushed against them as the doors were opened. The arrival of the dwarves cut through the chatter leaving only silence. One man stood; he was plump and wore extravagant garments, which were surely a size too small, and he wiped his mouth and ring covered fingers on a napkin before speaking.

"Why do you so boldly interrupt our feast?" he asked the guard.

"I am sorry, good Master," the guard spoke up, "One is injured and I believe they have been travelling a long while."

The Master gazed upon the company, "Dwarves," he mumbled curiously before chuckling, "I wonder what brings you so near to the Lonely Mountain, who speaks for you?"

Thorin stepped forward, "Thorin, son of Thrain, son of Thror," he announced.

Gasps erupted among the tables before the Master raised a hand to silence them. The master raised an eyebrow and stepped down from his table to face Thorin.

"You come to reclaim your homeland?" he presumed.

"We come with the hope that you will help us," Thorin said, there was a hidden desperation in his voice, "My sister-son is badly injured and we need medicine."

"Why should I not turn you away now?"

Thorin straightened himself and turned to face everyone in the hall. The guests looked on eagerly.

"No doubt you have heard of the wealth of King Thror," Thorin spoke clearly above the murmers of agreement, "When my kin has been cared for, I will return to the mountain to reclaim Erebor.

"And what of the dragon?" someone from the crowd cried.

"The beast hasn't stirred for decades; it may not be there and if it is then it will be greeted with the fury of my people!" the people of Esgaroth cheered as Thorin turned back to the Master, "No doubt that anyone who aided us on our quest will be rewarded handsomely."

Cheers erupted again amongst the guests and the Master's eyes glinted hungrily as a crooked smile crept onto his lips. Balin smiled proudly; Thorin looked and spoke like a true king. The Master quietened the hall once more and addressed the company.

"You have our hospitality," he bared a yellow grin as he held a hand out to Thorin. Thorin accepted it but was pulled close as the Master whispered in his ear, the smell of wine filled his nostrils.

"Remember your promise, dwarf-king," he said, "A share of that mountain is _mine_! Or I will gladly take back my hospitality and that includes medicine."

When the Master pulled back he hinted towards Fili, "If you break your promise then you will regret it, for your kin's sake," he whispered so that only Thorin could hear.

Thorin gave a hesitant nod before the Master announced the company as guests of Esgaroth, the people responded with more cheers. Fili was immediately taken to the healing house; Thorin and Oin hurried after them.

"Stay here, Thorin," Oin commanded when they reached the doors, "I need all my concentration."

Thorin didn't protest and sat by the doors for hours before the doors creaked open to reveal Oin.

Thorin looked up hopefully and Oin returned a weary nod as he dabbed his brow with a cloth. Thorin hurried inside but Oin caught his arm.

"I have stopped the swelling and he is resting," he said before his voice turned grave, "I cannot be sure what will happen when he wakes as injuries like this always have consequences."

Thorin furrowed his brow, "What do you mean?"

"It isn't likely that there will be no side effects of his injury," he searched for an explanation, "Bifur has never been the same since that axe was imbedded in his head," Oin gave a small sigh, "I am trying to say that we should be thankful that he has survived despite what may happen."

Thorin nodded and turned away from the healer as he entered the room. Fili lay on a bed which was to large for him; making him appear like a child again and his head was bandaged with clean cloth. As Thorin took a seat by the bed he felt his eyes fall heavy before his drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

Fili's body felt less heavy now and he carefully began to open his eyes. The light of a nearby candle flooded into his vision and he was forced to blink his sight back together. A shadow lingered in the corner of his eye and he turned to find someone sleeping in a chair next to him. They stirred and caught Fili in their gaze as they woke. Their eyes brightened at the sight of him and they gave a smile.

"Fili," he breathed as he neared. Despite the joy and kindness in their smile, Fili backed away, his mind feeling empty and blank.

The person halted as their eyes widened, "Fili?"

Fili looked down and his eyes lingered, "Fili," he repeated, "I know that word."

"Yes," the voice was encouraging.

"Fili is my name," Fili concluded before wondering out loud, "Why did I forget that?"

A hand gripped his tightly but Fili only let his fingers fall loosely and stared at the stranger more carefully. Long dark hair and a short beard, he noted, his eyes look stern but sad but lonely and hopeful all at the same time. A memory broke past a dark veil in his mind.

"_Then he picked up the branch," he had said when he hadn't yet grown his beard. As a young dwarf he moved his tiny hands along someone's left arm._

"_He used it as a shield because the nasty orcs made him lose his," he had continued. The owner of the arm gave a small chuckle and Fili felt a grin creep onto his face._

"_Do you see now, K_"_

The memory cut off again and his mind strained for it back. He felt so close to something though he didn't know what he was looking for. He realised that he was holding onto the person's left arm. The memory came back again, a little clearer this time.

_He let go of the person's arm and brandished his own, using the other to hold an invisible sword. He let out a small battle cry and leaped forward._

"_He fought on," he exclaimed, flailing his arms around, "before slicing off Azog the defiler's hand!"_

_Something smaller mirrored his actions and laughter erupted amongst the two._

"_And so they named him! Thorin Oakenshield!"_

Fili tried to catch the memory again but it slipped away. He moved his hands along the arm once more.

"Oakenshield," he felt the word on his tongue and it tasted so familiar, "Thorin Oakenshield."

Thorin placed his own forehead to Fili's. He gave a sigh of relief as he pulled away.

"Fili," he said with comfort in his voice, "What do you remember?"

Fili thought for a moment, "I don't know," he said slowly, "My mind is blank but I can feel things coming back to me. It's as though something's blocking the way."

Thorin nodded, "You should get some rest now Fili and we will see if anything returns to you."

Fili hadn't noticed that he was tired until now and felt his eyes droop shut again. Thorin brushed some hair from the blonde's face and seated himself beside his nephew again. He sat there throughout the night as he tried his best to fulfil his promise to his sister; to keep them both safe. He took Kili's buckle from his pocket and stared at it thoughtful as he held it in his hand. He looked to Fili as he quickly put it away, unsure of what to tell his nephew.

**We'll be back to Kili next chapter! I would normally go between Fili and Kili with each chapter but I needed to post what was going on during those days that Kili was mourning for his brother. I hope it wasn't too much of a cliché to give him memory loss but there needed to be side effects if his injury was serious and I tried my best to make it as realistic as possible. Again, I want to say thanks for all your support and please review- I would really appreciate it :)**


	7. Nothing and Everything

**Over 100 follows! How did that happen?! If I could find you all and give you a hug I would but have a Kili chapter instead. I think people have been looking forward to more Kili (who wouldn't?) so here you go…**

There was nothing. Nothing was left. Death is like losing a part of yourself; a hole which could fill again over time but never completely. For Kili however, Fili was everything; he didn't just lose a part of himself, he lost all he had and the spark inside of him was dying out. He had been hollowed out. The elves would bring him food and water often but all of it would be left untouched. Kili could not sleep and he would not eat. For Kili, his whole life was gone and all he could do was wait until he faded into the shadows.

For a day he had cried; an ugly and horrific wailing but then there was nothing more than silence which echoed from his cell. He had not moved from the dark shadows for some time as he wasted away. He was brought back from the haze of emptiness on the second day since he spoke to Thranduil.

"Kili?" Tauriel was crouching with her hands on the bars, there was no reply for a while and she called out again.

Kili pulled himself closer to the wall and closed his eyes as though to shield himself from her.

"I know you can hear me," she went on, "and I know that you have given up. I wanted to tell you…" she paused and took in a breath, "you can't give up, not now."

Kili scowled and spoke for the first time in days, "What would you know, elf?" he spat. His voice was raspy and quiet as he strained his vocal chords.

"I have lived a long time in your eyes," she replied kindly, "I have known many things, including death."

Kili turned to face her, squinting at the light which glowed from beyond her. Tauriel's eyes widened slightly but she dropped her gaze sadly.

"I did not give up," she continued, "In time I came to realise that I had not lost everything and so will you."

"I have nothing," Kili said flatly, he mustered all the strength he had left to continue; "My brother is dead."

His voice broke slightly; this was the first time he had said it aloud. The words felt like they weren't meant to come from his mouth, as though he had made a mistake.

"With every end comes a new beginning," Tauriel recited, "I was told this once, many years ago."

Kili let out a short, manic laugh causing Tauriel to flinch, "But there was still an end," he told her.

"What about your family?" Tauriel asked him, "There must be someone you need to return to."

Kili gasped, "Mother."

"Where is she?"

Kili looked back to Tauriel; there was genuine concern etched on her face.

"She is in Ered Luin," he said as though to himself, "Someone will have to tell her."

"And you will have to return to her," Tauriel whispered.

Kili turned on her suddenly and she jumped back slightly, "Why do you care so much?" he snapped, "Why does the death of a dwarf concern you?"

"Unjust death concerns me, life is something pure and beautiful which should not be stolen before it's time."

"You speak from experience," Kili murmured, he leaned weakly against the wall with his head down; not able to look her in the eye, "Who did you lose?"

"I had family once," she told him, "But I have never been alone. I will not allow you to think you are."

Kili moved closer and shifted his weight against the bars, shying away from the light of flickering candles as he blinked his vision clearer.

"You are very different to the young dwarf I spoke to no more than four days ago," Tauriel said as she leaned against the wall. They sat together, divided by sturdy wooden bars. Tauriel let her hand fall at her sides as she listened to Kili's tired breaths.

Kili lifted his gaze and their eyes met, "haven't we been here before?" he gave a weak smile and Tauriel returned with an elegant grin.

"So Kili is not completely lost," she lightly pressed her forehead to the door.

"Maybe not," his voice was small, "But Fili_"

Kili's words were strangled by a sob and he turned his head to the shadow, covering his face with one hand. He slipped his other hand between the bars until his fingers found Tauriel's. She looked at her hand curiously then to Kili, his body still wracked with silent sobs and she intertwined her fingers with the dwarf's, holding his hand gently.

"I will help you," she whispered and Kili froze, he let go of her hand and turned to her. Kili's eyes were reddened and shadows had formed beneath his eyes. His face looked pale and slightly hollow.

"I don't want help."

"I will help you," she repeated more clearly, "I want to ensure that you return to your family, your brother would not want this for you."

Kili thought for a moment as his face lit up. She was right, Fili would be kicking him if he could see him right now.

He asked her, "Why would you do this for me?"

"If I could return to my own family, I would."

"You would be risking much for me."

She exhaled slowly, "I know, but you are the sister-son to Thorin Oakenshield, you not only need to return for your family's sake but also for your people."

She stood up and turned on her heel.

"Wait," Kili cried, "What will happen to you if you do this?"

She looked over her shoulder and replied, "If I return with white gems I may be forgiven, can you help me with that?"

"I can, I promise I will."

Tauriel left and was gone for over an hour. She returned wearing a hooded cloak and carrying a pouch. Her bow was slung over her back and she wore knives strapped on to a belt which hung around her waist. Kili jumped as the door clicked open and peered out into the hallway.

"Quick," she whispered hurriedly, "We don't have much time."

"I am still unsure why you're doing this," Kili said.

"I believe it is the right thing to do and I think I like you to some extent."

She gave Kili some clothes which were too long but he managed to roll the fabric to fit his body. He realised now that he was a bit skinnier than before, when Tauriel gave him a small amount of bread and water he wolfed it down quickly. They hurried through the kingdom, at one point he narrowly escaped being noticed by a guard. It was easier than Kili had thought it would be to escape; Tauriel knew her way very well and had strong command over other guards so she was able to clear their path.

Soon, Kili was greeted by the darkness of Mirkwood and the murkiness of its air as they made for the elf path.

"Can you see how darkness has a hold over the forest," Tauriel asked, "These trees are not the same as I once knew."

Kili looked around; trees twisted upwards, creating a heavy canopy to hide the sunlight.

"I haven't told you the main reason that I do this," she continued, "There is no doubt that others will try to claim the mountain, evil things will try to take it for their own. Darkness has sickened my home and I will not allow it to take yours. I think you have a bigger role to play in Erebor's fate."

"You fear evil?" Kili asked her, she looked down to him and smiled.

"I do not fear evil, I fear an end to the good we have left."

Kili halted as his boot hit a hard surface and he looked down to find a white stone path. Tauriel had made her way a little further along it.

"For Erebor?" she asked. Kili stood up straight and felt stronger than he had in days. He joined Tauriel and they began to follow the path. He shook his head and replied to her, "No, for Fili."

**I'm not too sure about this chapter. Is it too cheesy or unrealistic? Please review, I would appreciate it :) I hope you enjoyed reading anyway and I hope you have/ have had a happy New Year! **


	8. Trust Issues

**Just for you guys, here's another Kili chapter! I got mixed reviews about the last one and I'm trying my best to fix any faults but I'm very glad that some of you enjoyed it :)**

Kili felt as if his head was clearing; the further from the forest's depths they moved, the less murky the air seemed to be. His heart still ached and he mustered all of his will to keep going; for his mother's sake and to honour Fili. He tried to distract his thoughts which only spiralled further and further into darkness; images of Fili slipping beneath the water as he cried out for his younger brother crept into his mind. In his heart he tried to believe that the orc had been lying and that Fili was still alive, however his head would cloud with doubt, bringing with it the loss of will to keep going.

Tauriel had not spoken to him in some time. Doubt already lingered in his mind and it had turned towards her. Kili did not full understand her reasons for helping him and distrust was stirring from within him. He glared at her from the corner of his eye but she barely acknowledged his presence, she kept on guard, snapping her head round at the smallest crack of a branch or crunch of a leaf. She was keeping watch for orcs and spiders, although Kili could not stop his mind from questioning her.

Why is she helping me? He thought over and over again, why does she betray her own people for one dwarf she barely knows? Is she tricking me?

Kili suddenly felt as though eyes were upon him, as if Tauriel were steering him towards danger. She had been so kind to him and the willing in her eyes to help had seemed so honest; it went against everything he had been told about elves. Elves were disloyal and would kick their own friends to the ground for their own gain, which was what Thorin believed. Kili only realised then that he was unarmed; completely exposed.

"Give me a knife," he demanded. Tauriel looked down and raised an eyebrow.

"I am armed," She replied, "You do not need a knife."

"That's exactly why I need a knife," Kili muttered under his breath. Kili had underestimated the sharpness of an elf's hearing and she swiftly turned in front of him, blocking his path.

"I am doing enough for you," she spoke with hostility in her voice, "Do not give me a reason to take you back! Perhaps you escaped and I was forced to retrieve you?"

Kili stretched himself up on his toes, though he did not match her height, "I do not trust you."

"And I you," she spat, something glinted behind her eyes and she furrowed her brows softly, her entire face seemed more gentle now. She turned away from him and moved on further. Kili felt his face twist in confusion and he called after her.

"I still don't understand," She stopped again but did not turn to face him, "Why would you betray your own people for one dwarf?"

She sighed and turned around as Kili moved towards her, "My king is willing to let other lands fall to darkness, unlike him, I believe we are a part of this world."

"So you want to help me get back to my people to save Middle Earth?" Kili laughed slightly but it ceased almost immediately; the ache in his heart only grew and the muscles in his face slackened.

She sighed again; her eyes became even gentler as though she were someone bearing bad news, "I hope that I can bargain you in exchange for the white gems."

"And you're certain my uncle will give them to you? You do not know him well."

"He will if he treasures the life of his only remaining nephew."

Kili's words failed him, how could she use Fili's death for her own gain? In a fleeting moment Kili found himself leap forward and knock her to the ground. She was swift, however, and managed to slip from under his weight and before he knew it she was over him with a knife pointed at his throat.

"Thorin was right! Elves are disloyal, cunning creatures and I should never have trusted you!"

Kili struggled beneath her; she was light but strong and sturdy like a young tree burying its roots into the soil.

"I have heard of the gold sickness in your family!" she cried, Kili ceased struggling and looked at her with puzzlement, "Where sickness is, dark things follow and I could see that sickness in Thorin Oakenshield."

She removed herself from him and held out a hand to him, Kili took it; her touch was smooth and warm against his dry hands as she pulled him to his feet.

"I do not see that sickness in you," She spoke with a spark of hope in her voice.

Kili swallowed before speaking, "I don't understand what you see in me, Fili was more intelligent, responsible… I could go on."

To Kili's surprise Tauriel lowered herself to his height and placed a gentle hand on his cheek, "I don't understand why but I have faith in you, My king knows that if your uncle reclaims Erebor then history will repeat itself and he is not willing to do anything about it."

She looked at him curiously, "There is something pure in you, in your eyes, like innocence."

Kili moved his lips to speak when a raspy cackle came from beyond the trees and by the river. Tauriel shot like lightening, daggers in hand, towards the noise. Kili armed himself with a stick he found on the ground and followed after her. The banks of the river were flooded with the bodies of orcs, blood stained the rocks and soil. Kili found Tauriel bent over something and upon closer inspection he saw that it was an orc, still living.

"Am I ruining your moment?" It choked on black liquid, "A dwarf and a she-elf."

It laughed weakly and clutched at its stomach where a small but deep gash pulsed with blood, it must have been lying injured for a few days now.

"Silence, Filth!" Tauriel pushed her dagger to its throat, "I have killed many of your kind and it would be my pleasure to end your life!"

"I killed some of your kind too," It wheezed. Tauriel looked around and sad memory clouded her eyes.

"Don't listen to it, Tauriel," Kili insisted, "Just kill it!"

"I got one of yours too," It choked with a crooked smile. The orc tried weakly to reach for a weapon which lay only inches away. Dropping the stick he was holding, Kili slammed his foot down on its hand causing the orc to shriek but Kili only ignored its cries. He picked up the weapon; a hideous thing carved from heavy, dark wood like some kind of club. Kili inspected it against the fading sunlight but his breath was caught short at what he found. The tip of the club was soaked in blood and matted golden hair.

"Fili," Kili breathed his brother's name in disbelief. He had known deep down that his brother was gone but to see the evidence before his eyes was too painful; as if his heart had ripped from his chest. The orc laughed again and Kili turned on it with a searing hot anger in his stomach. Tauriel backed away from the orc as though she could see what was coming. Kili raised the weapon above his head and brought it crashing down on the orcs face. It took several hits before it stopped moving but Kili kept going, black blood sprayed his face. Countless times he smashed the club downwards and muffled cries echoed from in front of him. In a blur he could see that it was Tauriel who was pleading with him and she pulled him to the ground, the club rolled from his grip and into the river.

"That is enough!" She cried but Kili only lay with panting breaths, his face was hot and wet.

"Why did you stop me!" he tried to yell at her but his lungs were busy trying to claim more air.

"It was dead," She was leaning over him, cleaning his face gently with a leaf, "I could not let you beat its dead body forever."

Kili shut his eyes and breathed more steadily now, "It killed my brother," he choked as a tear slipped down his cheek. Tauriel dabbed it away.

She did not speak but only cleaned his face of orc blood, after a few minutes she spoke again, "Revenge never helps, and it only brings more anger."

She helped him to his feet again, pointing a little further down the river, "There is the Long Lake," Kili followed her gaze and gasped as she continued, "And there stands the Lonely Mountain."

Kili stared at in disbelief. It was just like he had been told in the stories and more.

"It's bigger than I thought," he whispered. He thought of his mother and swore to himself that he would be there when she returned home and to do that he would have to fight, never give up. He felt himself smile; the first true smile that had been on his lips in a long time. Tauriel walked ahead and Kili stared after her thoughtfully.

She does this for the sake of others, not her own, he thought curiously. When he reached her side she handed him a dagger.

"I don't have much of a plan," she admitted. Kili strapped his new weapon to his belt and replied, "Me neither."

He felt it now, as he had not done before; a complete and unquestionable trust towards her.

**Thanks for reading! I'm still unsure about Kili's chapters- mostly because I feel like they're too cheesy or unrealistic… Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it and we'll be back to Fili next time and please review, I would appreciate it! :) **


	9. Guilt and Greed

**It was my birthday this week so we should celebrate my ageing with a Fili chapter!**

"Thorin, I don't know if I can agree with you on this instance," Balin spoke in a hushed voice. Most of the company were crowded around a table, with the exception of Fili and, of course, Kili, the dwarves whispered amongst themselves. Fili had woken a couple of evenings ago and had improved greatly; his head no longer ached as often, his dizziness wasn't as frequent and he was capable of moving around though he had only managed to get out of bed the day before. The dwarves had had to spend a day with the young dwarf to refresh his memory of each of them; Fili had not recognised any of their faces on first glance, as he had with his uncle, but after talking for a short while with each of them his memories had returned; slowly but surely. Sadly, Bilbo was forced to reintroduce himself to Fili as the young dwarf had no memory of the quest, or even leaving Ered Luin, which had put him into quite a state of shock when Balin had told him that they were in Lake-town.

"Balin," Thorin spoke clearly, though his eyes were pleading, "I have made up my mind."

Balin furrowed his brows before dropping his gaze with a sigh. Each member of the company remained quiet; barely touching their food, even Bombur sat as he lazily swirled his spoon around the bowl, never raising it to his lips. They were jolted from their silence when a voice sounded from the other side of the room.

"What have you made your mind up on?" Fili walked towards them with a puzzled look on his face as he cast a quick glance over his shoulder, "and why are you all looking at me like that?"

Bilbo spoke up as the rest of his companions stuttered, "No reason, K-," Thorin elbowed Bilbo in the ribs, "I mean no reason, Fili!" he concluded with a wheeze.

Fili raised an eyebrow but shrugged away the odd situation, "I just wanted to say thank you for the swords."

Thorin accepted his thanks with a small nod as Fili placed two blades on the centre of the table. They were short, likely to have been long knives to the men of Esgaroth, for they had been gifts from the Master, and lacked the sturdiness and history of the dwarves own metal-work but they were sharp and practical. Fili's eyes lingered over the full plates on the table.

"I was quite hungry too," he continued hesitantly, "but clearly none of you are."

"Have mine," Bilbo slid his plate over to Fili who returned a smile before taking a seat in between Ori and Bofur, he began to tear hungrily at a piece of untouched meat.

"I had thought that hobbits were fond of multiple dinners," he laughed with a full mouth, "Anyway, thanks, Mr Boggins!"

Bilbo gasped and turned rather pale, "I think I'll go to bed, it's getting late now," he stammered before getting up hastily disappearing from the room.

Fili looked speechless, "What did I say?" he asked, "Did I upset him?"

"Not at all, Lad," Bofur assured him with a cheerful grin and a pat on the shoulder.

"Halflings are gentle folk is all, not used to the sight of weapons on the table," Dwalin added.

Fili dropped a chicken leg which landed on his plate with a _clack, _his fingers frozen along with the rest of him, "I got his name wrong," he said slowly, Thorin stared at his sister-son worriedly.

"I know his name is Baggins," Fili mumbled before asking aloud to the rest of the group, "Why did I call him Boggins?"

Fili pushed himself up from the table causing his chair to fall with a clatter to the ground; the other dwarves stared at him with wide eyes.

"I think I'll go to bed too," he said, he kept his gaze directed at his feet as he turned away before disappearing around to corner, a door was slammed shut and his footsteps ceased.

"Thorin, please think about this!" Balin was the first to speak, he turned to the rest of the group, "I can't be the only one to think this is wrong!"

"I think Balin's right," Bofur spoke up, "this isn't the way to go about it."

Thorin looked up at them and his eyes were darks, "I will not risk this quest for anyone," his voice had a rising fire, buried deep, "not even my own kin."

Most of the company gave their king reluctant nods before leaving the room without a word, leaving untouched food on their plates. Only Thorin remained with Balin and Dwalin.

"I would usually stand by you," Balin said to Thorin, "until the end."

The old dwarf gave his beard a brief, frustrated stroke, "I don't know if I can stand by and let you lie to him about something like this!"

"I am telling no lies," Thorin growled, "Balin, he must not remember Kili, not for now at least."

"What if he remembers on his own?" Balin retorted, "What if we're halfway up the mountain when he suddenly turns on _you _for letting him forget his own brother."

"I will deal with that when the time comes but if he remembers that we," he halted his words and swallowed, "that I left Kili behind then he will try to go back and that will only delay our quest."

Thorin sighed, he was weary and his face softened, "Durin's day is not long away, less than a week, Balin, we are so close."

Balin could see that shine in Thorin's eyes, like a shimmer of hope but further behind it was a fearful glint; one that was etching its way closer to the surface.

"It is sad that he does not know of Kili," Balin's voice sounded tired, "I never thought anything could split those two up," the old dwarf raised his gaze to Thorin, "especially not you."

Thorin felt as though someone had plunged their fist into his chest and twisted their fingers around his heart, "Balin…" were the only words he could summon when a crashing sound echoed from down the hall. The three dwarves shot to their feet, Thorin grabbed Fili's new sword from the table as they raced down the corridor. They paused, listening, when another crash came from behind Fili's door. Thorin did not hesitate and plunged through the door, Dwalin and Balin on his tail, as he unsheathed his nephew's sword.

They halted suddenly and lowered their weapons, shock painted over their faces. Fili's room looked as though it had been touched by a dragon's wings, like its contents had been thrown up in a hurricane. Fili knelt amongst a pile of various objects; a pipe, pillows, pots, papers and all sorts as he rummaged through them. He shot a glance over his shoulder and looked the three dwarves up and down briefly before getting up and flipping his mattress off his bed.

"Fili?" Thorin said carefully, "What are you doing?"

Fili moved to the other side of the room and pulled the drawers from the desk before tipping their contents onto the floor.

"I'm looking," he replied simply, without raising his gaze.

"What are you searching for, Laddie?" Balin moved forward but Thorin halted him and made his own way forward and knelt beside Fili.

"I think it was…" Fili hesitated before his eyes trailed toward the sheathed sword which Thorin held loosely at his side, Fili suddenly grabbed it and looked at it curiously, "I think it was this."

He stood and held the blade up before swinging it, creating a wind-like whistle. He dropped his arms with frustration, "No," he said miserably.

His head shot up again and he leaped onto the mattress which now lay awkwardly by the bed frame before he whipped the sword down and tore into the fabric. Fili chucked the blade onto the floor and began to dig into the material, sending feathers flying in all directions.

"Fili, Stop!" Thorin stood up but Fili continued to rip the bedding apart, "Stop, Fili!"

Thorin grabbed his nephew around the waist and pulled him away from the wreckage but Fili only struggled against Thorin's grip.

"No! Please! I need to keep looking!" he cried. He kicked out as Dwalin grabbed his legs and the two of them pinned him to the floor as his struggling ceased.

"Fili, you will injure yourself," Thorin spoke soothingly, "Oin told you to rest."

Fili breathed heavily and squeezed his eyes shut as Dwalin and Thorin carefully released their grips. Fili sat up slowly and gazed at the floor.

"What were you looking for?" Balin asked.

"I don't know," Fili replied, his voice cracking, "I know there's something I need to find but I don't know what it is or where it is. I just know it's important."

Balin glared at Thorin who only looked back warningly. He held out his hand to his nephew and pulled him to his feet.

"I think you might have gotten us in trouble with our host now," he chuckled as he glanced around the wreckage of the room. Fili returned a weak laugh but he hung his head.

"Come on, Fili," Thorin began to lead him away, "We'll find you somewhere else to sleep."

Fili shrugged off Thorin's hand and backed away, "No!" he cried, his eyes were wild, "I need to find it!"

Thorin started forward but Fili was quick; he had grabbed the sword and was now pointing it at Thorin, he moved closer and Thorin backed against the wall. Dwalin and Balin stood frozen in disbelief.

"You don't understand," Fili spoke with hostility, "I need to keep looking."

The sword was touching Thorin's throat now and he choked.

"Fili," Balin pleaded, "look at what you're doing; look at who you're pointing that sword at!"

Fili looked at Balin then down the blade and up to Thorin's face, his eyes widened and he backed away, dropping the sword to the ground.

"What's happening to me?" he sounded like a child again, his hands shook but Thorin only pushed himself from the corner and pulled Fili into his arms.

"You need sleep," he said calmly, "Head injuries are strange and unpredictable things."

Fili was moved to stay in Ori's room seeing as he had made his own unliveable. No one else in the company was told of the incident and Dwalin had remained completely loyal despite the events. Thorin and Balin were the last remaining at the table once Fili was asleep and Dwalin had finally gone to bed in the early hours of the morning after a few more drinks.

"Does this not make you rethink your choice?" There was urgency in Balin's voice.

"You know what, or who, he was looking for," he continued, "he might not know what it is but he's going to tear himself apart looking for Kili, it will drive him mad."

"I told you why I cannot tell him," Thorin did not look at Balin he exhaled deeply and concluded, "He belongs with the company."

"He belongs with his brother!" Balin stood up and walked away before halting in the doorway, "I fear for you, Thorin, greed is blinding you the closer we get to the mountain. Don't let guilt and greed eat away at you, old friend."

The old dwarf sighed and disappeared, leaving Thorin alone at a table for thirteen.

**Just if you wanted to know… I usually listen to music when I write, some songs in particular for certain chapters.**

**For most of the Kili and Tauriel bits I listened to: Beyond the forest (desolation of smaug soundtrack) Sun gangs by the veils and the quit by Flip Grater**

**Fili's chapters tend to go along the line of Scarecrow by the veils, heal by Loreen and bittersweet melodies by Feist, these are just songs I like to write to along with a lot of stuff from Kimbra and Cat Stevens:)**

**I may have done a couple of references to the movie, but the story will be very different!**

**I also want to thank each and every person who reads, reviews, follows or favourites this story- without you I wouldn't be writing it!**


	10. Choking in your sleep

**Hello again! This is quite a late update for me because I tend to be quite speedy. Anyway, I think it's time to catch up with Kili and Tauriel :) Thanks to everyone who has followed this story, added it to their favourites or reviewed!**

Kili was still shaking. It was dark now; hours since they had found the orc. He held his hand firmly on the dagger which hung on his belt; his knuckles whitened as his bones pressed against his skin. Tauriel had told him that they were heading for Esgaroth, a town of Men, which sat on the Long Lake; she had presumed that the rest of the company would be there or at least she and Kili would be able to stop for a while. She had decided that they would cut through the forest rather than trek along the water side; orcs were more likely to avoid the forest and she knew the woods and their trees better than they did. Kili could feel her tensing at his side, he trusted her and hoped she trusted him but he could sense that something was troubling her. It was sad, in Kili's eyes, to see someone feel so out of place in their own home. But he understood now; she wanted to win her own home back as much as he did.

"You look weary," she spoke for the first time since the sun had set, "We could stop for a while if you wish, although we should be in Lake-town in only a few more hours."

"I'm fine," Kili replied, though his voice sounded tired and his legs felt as heavy as his lids.

"We are on the edge of the forest," Tauriel ignored him as she set her bow and arrow against a tree, "We should be safest in these parts and you can sleep while I keep watch."

Kili leaned back against a tree and let himself slide down into a comfortable position, "Don't you need sleep?" he asked with a yawn, forcing his eyes to remain open.

She gave him a small smile and unsheathed a blade, placing it across her lap, "I don't need to sleep as much as you do, and elf sleep is very different to yours."

Kili didn't hear the end of her sentence. When Tauriel looked up she saw the young dwarf asleep against a tree with his head lolling back. She stared more curiously, a short nose and beard; he did look less like a dwarf than the rest had but she could only wonder just how young he really was; barely into adult-hood surely.

Kili's dreams were empty to begin with; a quiet and peaceful darkness. A voice was what roused him from his dreams, one so familiar and comforting.

"You said you would be right behind me," Kili sat bolt upright to find his elder brother standing in the centre of the clearing, he looked as he usually did; clad in thick furs and leathers, two blades sheathed behind his back and his golden hair braided around his ears.

"Fili…" the word barely came out and he almost choked on his brother's name, "Is this some sort of trick?"

Kili looked to the sky where a canopy of twisting branched shielded the stars, "Gandalf said the forest would seek to enter our minds."

"This is no trick of the forest, little brother," Fili did not move, and his face had a rather blank expression, "Are you not pleased to see me?"

Kili pulled himself to his feet and began to walk towards Fili, "I'm more pleased than you could ever know," he felt a tear slip down his cheek.

The closer he got to his brother, the colder the air seemed to become and Kili pulled the elf clothes tighter around his body.

"Wearing their clothes?" Fili sneered as he eyed his younger brother, "And what's going on with you and the girl?"

"Tauriel?" Kili peered around his brother and saw that the elf was gone.

"Tauriel," the way Fili savoured her name on his tongue made Kili's stomach churn, "Is that her name? It's pretty."  
The way Fili grinned was nothing like Kili had ever seen in his brother; his eyes were burning in a way Kili had seen somewhere before, in someone else's eyes.

"Where is she?" Kili demanded.

"Why do you look at me like this, Kee?" Fili laughed maliciously, "She left, tired of you I'm guessing," Fili looked around, like a child checking for grownups, and beckoned Kili closer, "Maybe I could have my chances, I quite like redheads."

Kili's hand had struck out before he even had a chance to understand what he had done. Fili crashed to the floor and Kili stood staring at his hand as it shook before his eyes.

"Why did you do that?" Fili's voice sounded more childlike, less harmful, "Why would you hurt me again, brother?"

Kili felt his chest heave; he collapsed to his knees by Fili's side and placed a hand on the back of his brother's head. He gasped as his fingers touched the hot wetness which was tangled in Fili's hair. Pulling his hand back he saw that it was soaked in blood; he raised both hands together and saw his own red-stained fingers.

"Fili," he cried with urgency and pulled his brother onto his back, Fili was pale and there were dark circles under his eyes but he smiled at Kili all the same.

"What do you mean hurt you again?" Kili rested Fili on his knees.

"You left me," Fili's words tore through Kili, "I was cold and alone and in pain."

"Stop it!" Kili cried, "Don't say that!"

Fili only laughed, "Don't say that," Kili repeated, "I'm begging you."  
"Don't worry, little brother," Fili raised a limp hand and patted Kili's cheek, "You're the heir now, make sure to watch out for gold sickness though."

Fili began to laugh, not in the warm and wholesome way which Kili had heard almost every day of his life but instead he released a sharp and raspy chuckle which turned into a choke. When Kili looked down he saw his brother drowning, water poured from Fili's mouth and his hand gripped clumsily at Kili's shirt.

"No no no," Kili cried and began to pound on his brother's chest, "Don't do this to me!"

He continued to pound but Fili ceased movement and his eyes were glassy now. Kili wept into his brother's chest.

"What have you done?" the voice was soft.

"Mother?" Kili sobbed, "Mother, I couldn't do anything, I tried."

Dis only bowed her head in disappointment as his father appeared from behind her, "Kili, what have you done? I always knew that your recklessness would get someone hurt."

"Papa, please," Kili begged, "I didn't do anything."

"You sound like a child," Thorin stepped out from the shadows and placed a comforting hand on Dis' shoulder as she wept into her husband's arms.

Kili dropped his head only to be met be Fili's empty gaze and he quickly backed up against the tree he had been previously sleeping against.

Thorin advanced on him slowly, "Reckless, cowardly," he looked at his sister-son with disgust, "I should never have brought you on this quest for you have only proved a disappointment."

Kili pushed himself against the bark until his skin hurt and buried his face in his hands, "I didn't kill him."

"If you had stayed still then he might still be alive, maybe your father would be alive," Thorin growled, "Fili cried out for you, you know, before his last breath, you weren't there to protect him!"

Something rustled from the edge of the forest and Kili's head shot up. He flinched as a hand touched his shoulder and looked up to find the burglar standing above him.

"Wake up, Kili," Bilbo urged, "You know this isn't real, you know she needs your help!"

Bilbo held out a hand to Kili and pulled the dwarf up. Kili's eyes shot open. It was nearing dawn now as the sun seeped through the cracks in the canopies above. He realised now that he was sweating and his breaths were heavy. He scanned the clearing frantically, it was empty. It had been a dream, it never happened, he told himself but the words of his family still haunted him. His breathing halted briefly; Tauriel was gone. He could hear noises in the distance, by the gushing of the Forest River. He noticed Tauriel's bow and arrow abandoned by a tree opposite and Kili lunged for it before sprinting through the trees towards the river. He saw Tauriel fighting a group of five orcs, another lay dead on the rocks, as she swung her knife at another, cutting through its squeal as it collapsed on the ground. Kili raised the elf bow; it was too long for his stature so he turned his palm outwards as he notched an arrow, giving himself a better pull on the string. He aimed at an orc which stood behind Tauriel with its weapon raised. He let his fingers loose and the arrow flew true, piercing the orc through the neck. Tauriel shot a glance upwards and smiled as she continued to fight. One orc saw Kili and was climbing the rocks towards him, he notched another arrow and released before it pierced the beast in the chest. Tauriel finished another and Kili killed his third. The last was the largest, towering over Tauriel and it knocked her to the ground, she tried to grasp her knife but it kicked it from her hand with ease. Kili tried urgently to place another arrow into the bow-string but his fingers weren't quick enough.

Something shot by his ear and he cried out as his eardrum pounded. He looked up to see the last Orc lying still with an arrow protruding from its skull. It was an arrow of elf make but Kili had not fired it. Suddenly Kili felt the hard, cold metal of a blade against his neck as his head was tugged back by his hair. He looked up to see a fair elf with pale hair and icy blue eyes, he sneered down at the dwarf before looking to Tauriel who stood amongst the dead Orcs on the river's bank.

"Tell me, Mellon," His voice was like a strong breeze, "When did you become a friend of dwarves and a start ignoring your king?"

"Legolas, I have ignored your father before many times," Tauriel smiled in reply.

**So there we have it… Legolas: the third wheel. I'm joking :) I always knew that Legolas would have a bigger part in my fic and he's finally turned up! I also wanted to do a dream sequence which I finally got to do so I hope you like it :) I think this is my tenth chapter, I don't know how that happened seeing as this was originally a one shot. I would really appreciate reviews! :)**


	11. Moving on

Fili woke to the sound of snoring; something that made him smile though it faded when he turned to find Ori fast asleep in the other bed. He had fallen asleep straight away in the early hours of the morning, after the incident with Thorin, but as soon as the early morning light hit his face he had not been able to get back to sleep. He pushed the quilts from his body and put on his boots, which lay carelessly at the foot of the bed, as quietly as he could. Fili tiptoed towards the door, casting a glance back at Ori to make sure he didn't wake him, and then he slipped out the door and into the hallway. The master of Lake-town had some impressive quest quarters, big enough to provide lodgings and food for twelve dwarves and a hobbit. The thought of food made Fili's stomach growl, having only had a couple of bites to eat the night before, and he made his way to the dining hall.

Fili halted at the doorway upon seeing his uncle sitting at the table; he was hunched over, facing away from Fili. Fili stared for a while, wondering if Thorin was asleep but was startled when his uncle ran his fingers through his hair and blew out a puff of smoke from the pipe in his hand. Fili turned away slowly, trying in vain not to be heard.

"Why do you linger in the doorway, Fili?" Thorin asked as kindly as his deep voice would allow. Fili turned back around to find that his uncle had turned on his stool and was now facing him, his pipe still in his hand.

"I wasn't lingering, I didn't even see you," Fili lied.

A small smile etched itself on Thorin's lips, "You were always the better liar, Fili, but I could still always see through you."

Fili was puzzled, "Better at lying than who?"

"How are you feeling?" Thorin sounded calm but Fili had seen the whites in his uncle's eyes grow not a moment ago.

Fili sighed and took a seat at the other end of the table, "What about?" he laughed wearily, "Getting smacked over the head? Forgetting the past few months? Or maybe," he paused for a short breath, "Or maybe, how do I feel about the fact that I tried to kill you yesterday?"

Thorin lowered his eyes and his smile faded, "I meant your head."

"It's fine."

They did not speak for a while, even when food was brought for them, they sat and ate together; never making a sound. Thorin was surprised that Fili had been the one to break the silence, having spent most of his time trying to think of something to say.

"How are you?" Fili asked. When Thorin furrowed his brows Fili added, "Your neck."

Thorin pulled down his collar and rubbed his neck, "Fine. No skin was broken."

Fili looked down again and Thorin waited for the silence to come again.

"I'm so sorry," Fili spoke up, his voice was small, "I don't know why I did it, and if I could change it I would."

"Fili, no harm was done," Thorin stood up and moved around the table to seat himself by his nephew, "I am more worried about you."

Fili still didn't look his uncle in the eye and fiddled nervously with the rejected vegetables on his plate, "Don't be. Be worried for everyone else."

"Why?"

"I might try to hurt them too."

Thorin sighed and felt his heart ache. He tried to place a hand on his nephew's shoulder but Fili flinched. Thorin's hand hovered over Fili carefully before he pressed lightly on his shoulder. Fili did not move this time, enjoying the comfort.

"Fili, I do not believe that you would want to harm any member of the company," Thorin whispered, "We all care only for your health."

"I would never want to hurt you," Fili replied miserably, "but I tried to."

"I'll ask you again," Fili could almost hear the smile on his uncle's lips, "how are you feeling? And I don't want any mention of last night just yet."

Fili gave up and lifted his gaze to his uncle, looking into his eyes for the first time in what seemed like a very long time, "My head aches, though not as much as before, and…"

Fili cut off, searching for words, "Something doesn't feel right, like something's missing but I don't know what and it makes me feel so frustrated."

He slammed his fist down on the table, causing himself to jump and sending his plate flying to the floor. He gasped and grasped his fist with his other hand, pulling it to his chest. Thorin had not moved a muscle and when Fili tried to turn away again he took his nephews face in his hands and pressed his own forehead to Fili's.

"I can't stop it!" Fili cried, "Sometimes I'm so full of rage and I don't know why!"

Thorin pulled his nephew closer and let him weep into his chest. He had not seen Fili cry for over fifty years, not since Kili knocked himself out trying to hang upside-down from a much-too-thin tree branch. He hushed Fili and held the back of his head in his hand. Fili eventually stopped crying and quickly pulled away, wiping his tears hastily.

"But overall," he added with a weak smile, "I'm alright."

Thorin sighed, letting himself smile kindly in return, "Fili you have been through a lot, but you know that we have someone in our company who understands more than the rest of us."

Fili looked up, his face puzzled, "Who?"  
"Bifur," Thorin said.

"Bifur," Fili agreed.

The mad-looking dwarf sat across the table, Bofur sat cheerily at his side. It was past noon and the dining hall was empty apart from six dwarves who sat at the table; Bifur and Bofur at one end, Thorin and Fili at the other, Oin stood at Fili's side and Balin sat in between.

"So the… axe," Fili began carefully, "You can't get it out?"

Bifur only stared at Fili with his beady little eyes, Bofur grinned at his side and spoke up after taking a drink from his tankard, "Oh, aye, it's stuck in there alright."

"And aside from the language issues," Thorin began, "What other side effects are there?"

"He can only speak in Khuzdul," Oin spoke a little too loudly, clearly having misheard Thorin who tried his best not to nod impatiently.

"Yes we've established that thank you, Oin," Bofur joked, taking another drink, "Other than that, he has a mighty temper on him."

Thorin quickly cast a glance towards Fili who was looking curiously at the axe which was imbedded in Bifur's forhead. He raised his own hand to the back of his head and felt the healing scars and dented dome of his skull. He winced and pulled his fingers away. It was healing well but he still felt dizzy from time to time and he would get a pounding ache in his head now and again.

"Ubùrush?" Bifur asked gruffly, Thorin snapped his head to Fili with a worried look on his face, waiting for his answer.

Fili nodded reluctantly before quickly answering in common speech, clearly directed at his uncle, "It's not always painful, though. I'm fine. Really!"

Thorin scowled, "Your stubbornness, Fili!"

"And where do you think he inherited it?" Balin asked Thorin, sounding rather fed up. Fili glanced between the two and wondered what was wrong.

"As we were saying, Bifur has…language issues," Bofur interrupted, "A mean temper and, well, I think that's about it."

He smiled at Fili, "You see having a head injury isn't too bad."

Thorin glared at the toymaker who retreated to his ale. Fili laughed though, for the first time in what seemed like a long time and Thorin couldn't help smiling.

"I get angry sometimes, more than I used to before…" Fili's voice was serious now, "I couldn't stop myself."

"Understandable," Balin gave the young dwarf a kind smile, "And the company would understand if you were to stay in Lake-town to heal."

Thorin and Fili both stared at Balin, shock on their faces.

"I don't want to stay here!" Fili spoke frantically, "I want to see the inside of the mountain, I want to be there when you open the door."

"I will not leave my kin in the hands of men," Thorin declared.

"How about elves," Balin muttered only loud enough for Thorin to hear, who returned a dangerous look, but he continued despite it, looking to Oin, "Will he be healthy enough to travel?"

"Aye, no problem with his legs," Oin assured, "And a little extra fury might be helpful."

Fili smiled and Thorin clapped a hand on his shoulder, "Durin's day is the day after tomorrow, we leave in two days at dawn."

He excused everyone with a wave of his hand, four of them left, leaving Balin and Thorin alone again.

"Balin," Thorin warned, "You know my decision."

"Aye," Balin agreed, "And I cannot change it; I will support you best I can, Fili too."

Thorin nodded appreciatively before Balin continued, "I want to keep an eye on the boy. I understand we cannot leave him behind but what of Kili?"

Thorin halted in the doorway, "I will get him back, Balin."

"Aye and you'll have a lot to answer for when they find out."

"I know."

"How can you guarantee you'll get him out?"

"The elf," Thorin spat the word, "values something in the mountain that I am sure he will give Kili up for."

Balin sighed, "White gems, of course… but can you give them up?"

Thorin looked at Balin curiously, who continued, "Thror wouldn't have given his treasure up for anything, Thorin, and you know that sickness lingers…"

Thorin stopped abruptly, "We will not speak of this!"

Balin nodded but could see the fear in his king's eyes.

"We leave in two days at dawn," Thorin concluded.

**Hey guys! Thank you so much for over 100 reviews! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, not as action-packed as the last but it moves the story on :) I recently rediscovered my unused deviantart account which I had abandoned for three years so I thought I should put it to good use. I'm going to illustrate this fic and I've already uploaded the first chapter's illustration- my username is lenn33 so feel free to take a look and tell me what you think! Again, thanks so much for all the support and please review :)**

**Also, what Bifur said was basically, "pain?"/"Does it hurt?"**

**I wanted to include him more but I think he'll have to wait for future chapters :)**


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